Tuesday, 31 March 2009

Getting help

This morning I went along to the school counsellor. I had a bit of a meltdown a couple of weeks ago, and my poor friend that got the brunt of my tears sorted out a referral form after her saying that she can't believe I'm going through such a psychological upheaval without talking to anybody. Not that everyone should go and see a counsellor, but it is definitely such a big deal for me personally that she was totally right.

It was a bit of an ordeal and I don't think we even began to touch on a lot of the issues but I think it will be a very valuable process in the long run. She's asked me to come in the morning before surgery, next Tuesday, to have another session so I think it will be good as my nerves inevitably will have started kicking in by then! This last week has absolutely flown by so I can't even imagine how quick the next one will go!!!

Tuesday, 24 March 2009


So this morning was my work-up - had countless impressions of my bite and full teeth taken, final measurements and x-rays, as well as the installation of the dreaded surgical hooks. I didn't realise I would have one in between my 2 front top and bottom incisors! Yeesh, they are SO annoying. Haven't started hurting yet, but have my trusty wax to hand for when they do.

Can't believe it is the last time I saw my ortho now until after the surgery! I am having my pre-operative assessment tomorrow and then the appointment palaver has been sorted for next Friday... And that's it! Two weeks away! I am still hoping they won't cancel due to bed shortages, although I am convinced this is going to be the case! Good vibes from everyone on the 7th/8th please!!! God knows what I'll do if it doesn't go ahead as scheduled!

It really feels like it's all finally happening, and I can't believe it. Have started to be excited again and not just apprehensive as I have been the last few weeks. Have been showing mum plenty of post-op photos so she knows what to expect.

Have also finally moved house, it was such a relief on Saturday night to have everything unpacked and one element of stress disappear completely. Now for the end of term assignment... So enough procrastination already, and will crack on! Then I can concentrate solely on pre-op nerves!

Saturday, 14 March 2009

Greedy lazy buggers

I am SO looking forward to the day I have nothing to moan about.

I don't understand, why it has been the case for the last few months, that whenever anything is to happen, it can't just go ahead without any hiccups or hitches.

We went up to the new flat today to collect the keys etc and it was a tip. Hasn't really been cleaned since the last tenants, there are even drinks in the fridge still etc, and there are a few safety issues, namely some broken plug sockets, 2 windows that don't close (although not desperate as they are 3rd floor up), a new front door has been fitted but hasn't been painted or varnished so looks a good target for breaking in, and will rot in no time once it rains some, and a pile of furniture heaped up on a flimsy bit of board above the stairs. We can't move in while it's in this state, and the landlord claims he came yesterday and cleaned it himself! So we now have to meet with him tomorrow (instead of moving in) and try and reach some agreement as to what needs doing to make it safe, even though the rent is commencing from tomorrow. And the estate agency are no help at all (obviously taking the side of the landlord whenever it comes down to this).

It never ceases to amaze me how alone tenants are in the Big Bad World of renting. And although I am in no way naive, it still distresses me how inhumane people can be when it comes to money, and ripping other folk off. It makes me ashamed to be human sometimes.

Yet another thing to add to the list of pre-exam stresses, although I was hoping this would have been at least one that would've been resolved by Monday. For a half-full-glass-girl, I'm starting to find it mighty hard to stay optimistic; is it any wonder that I am convinced it will be just my luck for my surgery date to get cancelled!!??

Tuesday, 10 March 2009


So thank god my Ortho finally found out what had happened and is on the case. Apparently my surgeon can't make the wafer-fitting day but his registrar is going to come and do it in the morning, of the same day - I just don't know when.

It will be good to meet the reg though, seeing as he potentially may be assisting on the surgery... Do hope he doesn't put me off!

Having good days and bad days at the moment - seem quite weather-dependent, but think things will be a little easier once I've moved house and the end of term happens (i.e., I've handed my assignment in). Then I can just dedicate all my anxiety at the surgery. After reading other blogs am kinda sad I won't have an other half there with me, but think that's just because I am generally feeling sorry for myself today. I have tons of amazing friends who will all be on hand to mock my chipmunk face and cheer me up, so it could be a lot worse.

Sunday, 1 March 2009


I received a letter in the post on Thursday that beggars belief. Before I divulge its contents let me give you a quick idea of what appointments I have left pre-surgery:

March 23rd - Pre op 'work-up'; this is where they take the final measurements and casts so they can make the wafer - as mentioned before this is the plastic mould of my corrected bite they will use during the surgery to guide my jaws into the correct position

Tues 31st - Pre op check up, bloods etc to make sure I'm fit for surgery

April 3rd - The fitting of the wafer, to make sure it will fit over my teeth - though in fairness my ortho did say not everyone does this (although I can imagine it will give me piece of mind)

April 8th - Surgery

So this letter tells me that regrettably, my appointment on April 3rd has had to be moved. To May 1st. Almost a month AFTER my surgery.

I tried to suppress the wave of panic building up (I'm so much more anxious about everything these days - especially as I'm convinced my date is going to get cancelled and I have no idea how I am going to cope if that happens) and gave the number a call on Friday morning.

Of course, the woman that books appointments for the whole (large) department had no idea why it changed. So she put me through to the consultant's office. I spoke to a guy (I assume the secretary) who took down my hospital number and contact phone and told me he'd get back to me. I hadn't heard anything by the afternoon so called back. He hadn't even looked into it yet, and I told him that actually I think my ortho should be in this afternoon - he told me that was good to know and he would get her to call me. Didn't hear from anybody (and I know she would have called me if she'd got the message, so figured the weakest link there).

I'm just so annoyed as now have had to sit stewing about it over the weekend which is what I didn't want to happen. And ortho is not back in at the hospital until next Friday. And I'm so busy on Monday I can't keep chasing it up.

Don't people realise how stressful going through surgery is, without making it worse? If it's a simple re-schedule it could've been dealt with there and then.

I know I'm just being overly-anxious but I'm struggling to keep calm as it is. Fingers crossed it will all get sorted by someone with a little more competence.